The continuous flow of coronavirus news on my Facebook page, especially the rising numbers of people getting sick, passing away, and getting better, has been too much for me. It’s made me feel really anxious.
Even though there’s a lockdown, many folks are still worried because the number of COVID-19 cases keeps going up. I’m not just concerned about myself, but also about my family and friends.
While reading, I came across the story of a medical doctor in New York who contracted coronavirus because he had to wear the same face mask for several shifts consecutively, for four days. This was due to the limited availability of personal protective equipment. Unfortunately, he was the first ER Doctor to die from COVID-19.
The pandemic has really affected me. Sometimes, I wake up in the middle of the night feeling scared for no reason. My mind keeps racing, and I can’t sleep. I know this anxiety isn’t good for me, so I need to find ways to relax. I’m not sure if what I’m feeling is paranoia, or if everyone goes through this sometimes. I wish I knew why it happens.
Here are the crazy things that went through my head:
- What if I get infected with coronavirus? Can I go back home?
- Will I die in five (5) days?
- Will I die alone?
- Am I ready to die?
Later on, I started thinking again and asked myself, “Am I ready for death?” Honestly, I’m not sure. I’ve lived a life full of regrets, feeling lost. I don’t know how to go back to God after going so far away. I’ve been living like I belong in this world forever, instead of just passing through. I feel really sorry for what I’ve done.
May God help me!
OREMOR 